Sunday, February 22, 2009

Oscar licious


So Slumdog rules the universe. Kate skated away with Melissa's statue. Heath can finally RIP. Sean Penn deserves the statue for playing Harvey Milk and 3somes with foreign women and a hot, talented wife.
Robert Pattinson has huge feet. Alicia Keys is beautiful. Mickey Rourke needs a shower.

Friday Night Lights is still the best show on television. Watch it people. xoj

Friday, February 20, 2009

It's over. It never happened!


In early December 08, a business partner of mine was in LA for meetings we had set up for a current project. Each day of her 4 day biz trip we rushed here, there and everywhere. In the blur of meetings, auditions and lunches, she mentioned she bought tickets for us to a secret show hosted by Funnyordie.com.
FYI-I spend hours of my life on Funnyordie. com. The video that hooked me to prominent website was THE LANDLORD. I've watched Pearl threaten to smack Will Ferrell hundreds of times! Bitch, bitch, bitch! I've always liked Will Ferrell but he became my favorite comedian after I watched Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby. I have a hard time between Will Ferrell and Dax Shepard, but for blogging purposes, Will wins.
Back to the biz at hand: We have tickets to a secret Funnyordie show? "Sweet" I proclaim. Her last night in town, the only time we really get to hang out and it's a surprise?! I can't wait. Honestly, we are both hoping it turns out to be Will Ferrell who is always working with the Funnyordie.com crew. The real question is; can we be that lucky?

The night of the secret show arrives. We are both mentally and physically exhausted, famished, parched and not to mention running super late to the secret show which doors will be shut and locked automatically at 8:30PM Sharp.
8:25PM we pull up to secret venue to find rock star parking. (That's how we roll.) 8:26PM we are in the reception which is just now being called into the theater. (On time suckas) As we walk in; threats are made on our cell phones..."NO TEXTING....NO PHOTOS....NO CALLS...this is a secret show folks. No communication with the outside world. We will take your cell phone and we will flush it" The Theater manager raged. The theater sat about 150 people, all struggling with cell phone separation anxiety, me included.

We found our seats. They were awesome. No one tall in front of me or smelly next to me. We were happy clams waiting for the secret surprise to reveal its mystery self! It didn't take long for everyone to sit down, be reminded to turn off all cell phones and shut up. The lights went black for a moment. Suddenly...a narrator from the darkness and into a microphone explains we are about to see a one man show with a series of songs and a projected slide show; that actually won't be in tonights show. Silence...darkness...the rustle of the eager audience. I was begining to doubt how funny this show was going to be. Who and WTF?. A slide show? Lame. I'm far to tired to pretend a show is funny if isn't funny and slide shows suck!

Finally a small theater spotlight shines center stage to reveal Will Ferrell as George W. Bush in his one man show, You're Welcome America ***A Final Night with George W. Bush****. I screamed out like a horny groupy; as did most of the audience. I had a surge of energy and alertness. I had to grab my biz partner; wrap my arm around her arm and ask her if that was WF to believe it was happening. She laughed, unwound her arm from mine and confirmed that it was indeed WF. Will Ferrell on the stage in front of me with only 148 other people? It was the truth! Damn straight. (This was one of the nights I also realized how freaken cool it is to live in LA County)

The show was fierce; hysterical; brilliant. I was shedding tears of laughter while bending over to prevent an oncoming hiccup attack from disrupting my amusement midway due to laughing non stop. The show consists of Will Ferrell in a suit, well known songs from the 70's, 80's and 90's and a photo slide show, that didn't exist but WF told us who the imaginary photo would be, eventually. WF had notes in his hands through majority of the show and a ball point pen. He would make quick notes, scratches and marks as the show went on. Barely noticeable BTW. It was hard to notice anything other than how believeable Will Ferrell is as GWB.
When the show was over WF thanked the 150 of us and told us we were his first test audience and that he actually was taking notes and making changes, based on us and our reactions for his broadway show. AWESOME! We left feeling so lucky that we should stop and purchase lottery tickets. It has been a great business trip with a kick ass ending.
CUT TO-
Last night I was at dinner with a new business colleague at Versailles on La Cienega. As we grubbed down on our Cuban cuisine, I spotted a billboard out the window with Will Ferrell pasted on it. I found myself studying the billboard rather than listening to the client list of my new colleague. I thought about the secret show in December and just how freaken cool it was. I realized the billboard was infact promoting WF's one man show and its live premier on HBO March 14, 2009.

You have to see this show people. As hilarious as it is(and it is) it is also heartbreaking on so many levels. Our country has been through so much BS over the last 8 years. We deserve an apology from our former president and his whitehouse staff. We will never get it! I know this and have come to terms with it. We have been left in a terrible recession, a never ending war and a freshly brewed war. WF and his one man show helped me get to that space where I can forget about the liver cancer that was farmed for 8 years on America and move forward with the Obama cleanse as if the past never happened.

Thank you, Will Ferrell for bringing the chaos full circle and leaving me with laughter and surprise! xoj

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Life long friendships




Valentines Day! So Valentines Day and I have a relationship the same as most mostly single people do.....we hate each other. Usually I am out with a close girlfriend or group of girls and the day/night goes by with a few bottles of wine, delicious gossip and tastey food. This year my friend MK, a guy that I have known since I was 16 that I grew up with in the small hick town where I went to high school, sent me a text asking if I wanted to be set up on a date?!.

Before I get into the details, I have really known MK for over 15 years. He has lived in Burbank for about 6 years and we were roommates in Burbank in 2003 for a few weeks.

My first attempt at moving to LA fresh out of film school. I left when I got an internship at an ad agency in Seattle that I had wanted more than anything in LA.


The ad agency is now defunct and the owner now owns one of the trendiest night clubs in Seattle. A much more fitting business for him.


So, back to it, MK and I have known each other forever. We know who each other has slept with, dated, hated. We've partied way to hard together. He knows things about me that I hope he never tells anyone in LA and vice versa. We still hang with a lot of the same people when we are back in Seattle. In some ways, MK is like a brother.


So when my long time friend/brother sends me a text asking if I want to meet and go out with an Oscar nominated(this year) crew guy coming in from NYC, I think....sure. MK has my best interests in mind, so it must be a good idea.

Turns out the night he wants me to meet this mystery Oscar nom is Valentines night. PRESSURE! However, I'll be with MK and his wife, so I'll be fine, right? No! It turns out this mystery blind date shows up with his wife and MK has no idea what to do next.

MK has set me up on a blind date, on Valentines Day with an unsuspecting married man. Needless to say, I'm not a fan of Valentines Day and it doesn't appear I will be any year soon. VDay can eat a dick for all I care.

Lesson learned: Never let one of your GUY friends set you up on a blind date. They forget about the minor details!

I've promised in a past blog to blog about dating in LA. The problem is, I haven't really dated in LA yet. I'm not sure how ready I am to date in a city with 9,948,081 people living in it. There are billboards stating that over 30,000 women get STDs a year in LA county alone. That is disgusting. Also, LA gets smaller and smaller each day that I'm here. Everyone knows everyone in the industry.

All I want to do is get screenplays made into movies; movies distributed and money for my investors. I don't need anyone knowing anything other than that about me.
xoj

Friday, February 6, 2009

Ex Boyfriend Letters


Every so often I receive emails from Ex Boyfriends bleeding with apologies, regret and warm regards. It has been a good 3 years since I've been sent one of these disruptive, intrusive and self indulgent emails. Guess what folks?; I was sent one tonight. Lucky me. I was hoping to sip a Martini, blog and watch a movie in my jammies, when bam!; the said email waiting for me in my inbox. Whatever with the 2 year later admittance of your play by play as to why you think we broke up. You Ex Boyfriends are never right; you're always wrong. It is absurd that you EB's think that a simple email with an askew POV will make up for the time spent with you and even more, the time that has passed since you. Are you EB's really that retarded to think we ladies want an email from you? I'm speechless. No words. My thoughts; Why? Really? WTF are you talking about?! We'll my EB certainly got our history all wrong, which makes the apology useless. 2 years have passed, buddy. 2 years! Next time just send an email that asks me "what's up?" "How you been?" What's new with you?" I'd be more inclined to reply to those questions and the sincerity of them than your old ass, way over due, apology.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Golden Globes and Oscar noms

I'm finally beginning to fulfill my goal of watching all the Golden Globe and Oscar nominated films before the Oscars on February 22 2009 on ABC.  Last night I watched Revolutionary Road directed by Sam Mendes, starring Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio.  This is a beautiful film with an amazingly well told and acted story.  The cast deserves every nomination they have landed and the most deserving in my opinion is Michael Shannon.  Shannon plays the mentally ill son of the Real Estate agent (Bates) that sold the Wheeler's their home on Revolutionary road when the couple was forced to move to the burbs in the 1950's due to April's (Winslet) first pregnancy.  Frank (DiCaprio) and April have another child and appear to be the most perfect couple on Revolutionary Road.  The family and the marriage are far from sound.  This is a harsh film and although lengthy, kept me on the edge of my seat.  I was nervous, anxious and desperately wanting this dismal and harrowing story to come to an end. The Wheeler's and their world were originally written and created by Richard Yates.  Yates is an original at layering disguised, emotional, conflicts.  He forces readers to reflect on themselves and the world around.  Mendes keeps true and sincere in the movie version.  The film left me happy that 50% of marriages in America NOW end in divorce.  We have options people!  Options!  I'll stick with the single slice, cheese only. xoj

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

The True Adolescents Experience


I have worked on a dozen independent films wearing many hats on all of them. Two of the short films I have produced and managed have gone on to win awards at the Florida Film and Musica Festival (First Date dir. Alesia Glidewell), Seattle True Independent Film Festival, Twin Rivers Media Festival (Courage Doesn't ASK dir. by Joe Acton) but none of the features I have ever worked on have gone on to screen at festivals in competition. That was until Yesterday when SXSW posted this years lineup announcement. True Adolescents written and directed by Craig Johnson and produced by Thomas Woodrow is the little indie film that could. Craig is originally from Bellingham WA and ended up in NYC attending NYU where he met Thom. Together they flew out to Seattle met Sean Porter and Laurie Hicks and the rest is history. I worked as the production coordinator on this project and met and have made some of my greatest friends on this film set. As any low budget indie does, you have your days. Ours had to have been when the camera truck caught fire and the entire crew spent the day cleaning the camera equipment as apposed to shooting when one of the lead actressess was schedule to fly away in 2 days. Although this day was awful, the NYC & Seattle crew bonded, pulled it out and made it happen. I loved working on this film and I love the crew. I'm so excited to reunite with my TA family in Austin for the world premiere. Thank you Thom, Craig and Jenny Lee for all your hard work in post production. This amazing news speaks loudly of your determination and dedication to this project. Thank you Gil Holland, Emanuel Michael and Stu Pollard for supporting the project. Look out Austin, here we come. xoj